Tuesday, November 27, 2012 at 10:46PM
Today started out roughly emotional. I woke up right where I went to sleep. Go to sleep crying wake up crying. Was an emotional ness first few hours then I managed to talk with my mental health support worker and things felt a bit better. I then determined I just needed to get out so I went to the center hoping Kara was CV coming today. But she couldn’t make it. Things still went well myself Diana and Donna sue talked for a while almost an hour the Donna sue went upstairs to do paperwork and Diana and I chatted a bit before Courtney came. Courtney Diana and I had a good eclectic group. We talked some. Discussed DRA and some addiction stuff including me opening up some and also providing some drug education. We then read the daily meditation for today and it was good. It was about trust and trusting ourselves. Then that lead into talk about negative self talk and how to overcome it. I spoke about the idea surrounding affirm nations and what they can help with and how. Then we went through the healing from trauma affirmation 20 minute track from belleruth naparstek. As that ended we began talking only I then has to go as I had appointment with Jane. That appointment went well. We discuss some aspects of emotions and discussed therapy and ng needing therapist. Also talked about possibly going back to blue ridge for psychiatry. We decided Jane was going to make an appointment for me and I would go and try to work with it wherever she puts me. That allows the overwhelming stress surrounding choice and fear to be relieved since Jane is taking care of it for me. Talked also about my medication and my emotional breaking down as a response to coming off medication. Also talked about my functioning ability and my discomfort with not being highly emotional and on a high level of emotional chaos and how my discomfort stems from calmness. When all is calm something is about to happen cause nothing stays like that for me. We then went to the cavalier for supper together and played around of pool before realizing we had something else to do. We left went and ended up sitting chatting and went well. Then Jane dropped me off we said see you skaters before she left. The moon was full and bright. Really nice night. The day gas ended well. About to take shower after taking my sleeping medication and going off to bed when I get out. Get full good nights sleep. Thinking about volunteer opportunities and my need for purpose, meaning, and structure.
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