More poetry

>Another day
Its all the same
Seems just like yesterday
Never knowing what I became
They all walked away
Left me alone
Just wanted them to stay
If they had only known
How much I live in pain
As my life continues down the drain
I have lost the fear
As I no longer care Soon I will not be here

So many people I have known
But yet I still feel all alone
Life has taken its toll
Severly damaging my soul
I will never be whole
I will never be free
All this pain I have buried inside of me
Cant anyone really see
Why wont they just let me be
Let me end all the misery
I dont want to keep just getting by
I just wanna die

So much filth
beneath my skin
buried within my soul
go the secrets still untold
the disgust under my skin
cannot be scrubbed away
nor has it ever faded
disgusted by the filth
that is hidden within
I carve my skin
trying to rid the sin
realizing the dirtiness
will never dissapate
no one really knows nor understands
the damage there is within
as i continue drowning
fading into the darkness
from the dirt beneath my skin

day to day the pain does not really fade
hiding the shame living day to day
wishing it all would fade burying the pain
pushing people away when it becomes too much
I begin to break from all the shame

running through my mind
memories poison me
spinning and racing
remembering where i have been
drowning inside
i am about to fall
dont try to catch me
want my life to end
already dead inside
alone in this world
i continue to crawl
no reason here to live

overwelmed with guilt
i wish i was dead
the pain within
buried by sin
i was betrayed
by my very own mind
just trying to be protected
it could have been anyone
i gave in
let him commit the sin
now i will never win
when will my life begin
or is this just the end

why do i continue to live
why do i even try
why cant i just die
try to let go
try not to tell a living soul
committing suicide is my goal

try to rid myself of the pain
the poison drilled in my brain
the care he gave
sending me to my grave
i remember the first time
i was confused
many thoughts ran through my mind
still feel the confusion inside
continue to tell everyone i am fine
no one for me to confide
the secrets are mine
they stay buried inside
I continue to hide

you think you know me
jus let me be
when will you really see
i will never truly be free
the secrets i hold deep in me
what a relief it would be
if you could really see
then maybe i would feel free


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